love and war and the sea in between.

"Here I stand before Your throne, asking You to be the voice of the dreamer. Be the whisper. Hush the voice of doubt. Hush the fear of failure. The voice that tells me that I am in over my head, of course I am, but You are the sea and You are the life boat. You surround. This could be a 'set your sail and risk the ocean' moment. So boldly I will raise the anchor and cut the rope that ties me to the shore of certainty, to the shore of safety. My flesh longs to stay tied to the dock, but my soul yearns for the storm, to find You in the hurricane. In high tide and in low tide, faithful You remain. There is nothing to fear in Your seas, all that exists are waves of mercy and grace. Give me storms when i need them and smooth waters when You permit. And even if this ship goes down and the journey ends, I will know that is has only just begun and You will always remain. You, my choppy waters. You, my hurricane. You, my driving winds and pelting rain. You, my rays of sunlight. You, my crystal sea. You, my life vest. You, my light house. You, my starry night. You remain the same."
(journal entry, 9-25-2011)

That is my heart.

i love my Savior and i love the sea.

i want to be bold. i want to love fearlessly. i want my life to be risky. i want to thrive in the uncertainty. i want to traipse courageously into the unknown grasping the hand of Jesus. i want to bypass any notion of rationality or logic and simply follow Him, even when it doesn't make sense and the whole world tells me i am a fool. I still want to say yes to His beckoning.

i want an adventure.

-abbie.